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Sunday, March 28, 2010

Managing Your Expectations


Giving Without Expecting Anything in Return
love unconditionalSome of the unhappiest people in the world are people who expect something from others, particularly if these others owe them favors. While we are all taught that if we do things for people it will usually return to us, this is not always the case. You will find that you will typically be a much happier person if -- when you do something for someone or give something to a person -- you expect nothing in return.

It has been said that people who keep their expectations low have little cause to whine. For instance, if a close friend of yours is in a bind and asks to borrow some money, give it as a gift instead of lending it. Realistically, if a person is in a real financial bind, that person probably cannot pay you back anyway. If you lend money to this person and do not get it back, you might find yourself getting very angry and upset. By the same token, if you do not have the money to spare, then tell your friend this too. It is better to be honest in this case. Just tell your friend you do not have money to lend him and try to help your friend come to a solution.

It is easy to do favors for other people whom we are pretty certain will return the same for us. In other words, it is easy to give some nice gift to a rich friend of ours as we are pretty certain that this rich friend will give us a nice gift in return. It is much harder and much nobler to do a favor for someone you know cannot return the same. This is what divides the happy people from the miserable people. Those individuals who genuinely help those in real need
expecting nothing returned are among the happiest on earth whereas the ones who expect something back are quickly disappointed.

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