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Thursday, May 27, 2010

secret relationships -fun or disaster

Secret Relationships - Fun Or Disaster



Secret relationships seems to offer mystery and appeal at first. But are they really all they're cracked up to be? There are two types of these kings of relationships: those that are secret to your current spouse or partner, and those that are secret to others in your life because you are not currently in a "public" relationship.

The reasons for keeping a relationship secret when you are already with someone are obvious. This might be fun for a while, but it usually turns out to be no fun at all, and many people will get hurt.

Why, you may ask, would someone want to carry on with secret relationships even if he or she is not currently involved in another relationship? A lot of times it has to do with wanting to avoid the disapproval of parents, relatives, and friends. This should actually make you think about why they may disapprove. Should you take another look at your secret partner through their eyes? On the other hand, if you really don't care what they think, and you don't agree with them, why would you go to lengths to keep the relationship secret?

Also, while it may not appear to be this way, most parents and others who are close to you just generally want you to be happy. They will do what it takes to protect you, but if there is some reason that you need to be protected from whoever you are involved with, then you should really not get involved in the first place. This does all have to do with the mystery and intrigue of it all too. Sometimes a little danger makes things more exciting, but can you carry on a relationship like that?

Keeping your partner a secret can really become a burden after a while, and you may decide to throw in the towel and just introduce him or her to everyone and take what comes your way. After you've made this step, go ahead and ask your family and friends what they think about everything. Be prepared to accept negative comments -- after all, you've kept the relationship secret for a while. But you may be surprised by what they say. And it could be that the only negative thing they have to say is that you shouldn't have been so secretive.

Now it's your turn to access the situation. What is it that made you want to keep your relationship a secret? Were you embarrassed by something about your partner? Or are you so possessive that introducing your partner to other friends would make you feel insecure about the two of you? These are not good reasons to keep a relationship secret. Sooner or later, you will have to face up to facts and how healthy the situation is. Secret relationships can start out fun, but they don't often en
d up that way.

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