How To Be A Good Girlfriend / Boyfriend
If you don't think you are relationship material because you have trouble keeping a boyfriend / girlfriend, maybe some information on how to be a girlfriend / boyfriend would be of some help to you. You can read books on the subject or go see a counselor, which is a good idea if things don't improve for you, but for starters, read what follows and see if you agree.
First of all, understand that relationships are a two-way street and you can't always have things your own way. Compromises on each others' parts sometimes have to be made to keep the peace. If you find yourselves fighting about every little thing that comes along then maybe you aren't suited to each other.
I believe it is healthy to be able to have an argument (on occasion) and then be adult enough to either make that compromise or work it out some other way that is beneficial to both of you. When I say compromise, I don't mean that one of you suggests something and the other one just rolls over and takes it. I mean, actually work it out, use a piece of paper and pencil and write down the pros and cons of the problem and really work out a solution.
Knowing how to be a girlfriend / boyfriend isn't rocket science but it will take some effort on your part to help keep the relationship moving forward. Not that it is all your responsibility in this day and age. Hopefully you have a boyfriend / girlfriend who is enlightened and knows this, too. The last relationship I had that failed was well over ten years ago and a friend of mine told me that it was completely the woman's responsibility to make it work.
I disagreed with her. I don't know which century she thought she was living in but it certainly wasn't the current one. I believe it is half of my responsibility to make it work. A relationship takes both people to make it or break it. When one can't talk to or reason with the other because they always have to be right, the relationship cannot last.
Things started out great, as most relationships do, but in time, I began to realize how selfish and insensitive he was and I put up with it for some time. I don't really know why I put up with it for as long as I did but I decided one day that life was too short to live that way so, I ended the relationship. The relationship I am in now is so much better, we rarely argue and if something is bothering either of us we talk it through and come to a solution or at least a compromise so we are both satisfied with the outcome. When you are with the right person, things are just easier, not to mention a lot calmer and more comfortable.
The main thing that I have learned is that I need to make myself happy first and the rest will follow. So far so good. Seems that when I ended that relationship I left all my baggage back there, too. It feels great to finally be traveling light. I guess that somewhere between the two relationships I figured out how to be a girlfriend.
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