THE COMMITMENT TO LOVE
Commitment to love is like a CRUET. What is a CRUET? Cruet are containers for vinegar and for oil. It is contained in their own bottles. Once you mix them together you will see the oil separate and the flavor flat. To enhance the flavor you must add the spice of sugar and salt to brighten and enlighten your wonderful taste buds to become a wonderful dressing to serve.
Our Commitment to love must be like a CRUET. C is for commitment; R is for respect; U for understanding; E for endurance; and T for trust. Once you combine all this together the spice and fire of romance comes alive. You must have all five ingredients to make your marriage work and putting God in the center of your lives.
The spice and fire of romance starts when one falls in love. The spices are the wonderful moments and memories of how you met; the gifts, the outings, the passionate kiss, the hugging, the travels, and also the trials, the misunderstandings, disappointments, heartaches, betrayals, etc. - the fire that ignites that romance is forgiveness, patience, and unconditional love.
One must remember that with planning of marriage there are responsibilities to be taken care of. These include your budget, where to live, household chores, food expenses, financial expenses and planning in all aspects, planning to have a child, expenses for hospitals & doctors, educational expenses, insurance, travels, child care, disciplinary methods and styles, etc. You must also talk about if you will have extended responsibilities to your own family. This maybe support for your parents; schooling of a brother or sister; or one of them may live with you or you live with them. All of these responsibilities will be part of your life and give direction to your goals of success. This will depend on the couple on how mature and sincere they are of their commitment to love.
Part of the commitment to love in marriage is sex and intimacy. The intimacy, the touching, the caresses the kisses, the hugs, holding of hands must never cease. These are what ignite the fire of love and endurance. Sex should not be a routine and forced on one another. Sex is to be savored with love, sensitivity and emotion for the both of you.
Both of you must also give yourself space to do things on your own. Plan vacations or simply a day out together in the park, movies, or go to a weekend retreat to enrich your whole being. If we want our children to have good moral values and relationships it should start from us.
To maintain that fire of romance burning couples must show some small love acts such as : A) show interest on your partner’s activities. Ask how his day went and listen. ; B) show affection – kiss, hug, hold hands, play footsies, tickle each other ; C) be considerate- help in household chores, help in taking care of the kids, call to say hello, buy your spouse a favorite snack; D) show your appreciation – by telling your spouse how important he or she is to you inspires the person to do better; E) say you are sorry – apologize for your remarks, remember pride will not get you anywhere; F) listen and understand your partner– if your spouse has a problem listen, ask questions about what happened in a loving way, then see what suggestions you can give. Your tone of voice must be gentle and you must try to understand his feelings, at the moment your spouse is hurting be loving. G) laugh and play together – share your funny moments at home, at work , with friends, play tennis, golf or any parlor games, share jokes, play cards, go to movies, or simply a stroll in the park and tickle each other.
The spice and fire of romance is a life time journey and both have to nurture that fire to continue burning till death. This legacy must be shared so your children can follow your path.
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